© 2018 by PURVA GROVER

Being a woman

Join us as we learn, unlearn.

To be a part of this journey, drop a line.

Wax your arms, legs. Wear a bra. Have a period.
Kiss delicately, and passionately too. Colour your hair.
Shed a tear. Watch your heart break. Eat a dark chocolate bar.
Wear pink. Know the difference between fuchsia and magenta.
Think babies. Learn to walk in heels.
Study hard, make a career. Learn to balance home and work.
Fix a bad-hair day. Know your skin type.
Obsess over inches lost and gained. Trust your girlfriends.
Sit properly. Bend carefully. Talk politely.
Order a Cosmopolitan, clink wine glasses.
Prosper. Get promoted. Climb up the career ladder.
With a jerk, give it all up.
Prioritise. Your home and family need you.
First name. Last name. Change, accept.
Flirt, cautiously. Fall in love. Marry.
Cellulite. Carats. Calories.
Deal with ex-files, tick boxes.
Resist chugging beers, or enjoying malts.
Never complain about being a mum.
Judge, be judged.
Embrace the in-laws. Don’t complain.
Stay strong. Don’t be afraid to show your weakness.
Tackle bitches and boyfriends.
Be ashamed to be a spinster.
Speak up for yourself. Know when to stay quiet.
Look good, put on make-up. Don’t let anyone know you have put an effort into dressing up. Dress your age.

Awaken the child within you.
Don’t smoke, cheat.
Forgive and forget.
Wear nail paint. Be apologetic of getting old.
Learn how to wear a saree. Know when not to wear a skirt.
Know how to fix a flat tyre. Love the man who opens the car door for you.
Compete with the men. Don’t hurt their ego by letting them know you are equals.
Go for an all-girl holiday. Drink, shop, party. Keep it a secret.

Stop trying be a hero. Do the laundry.
Permit yourself to explore, grow. Seek permission.
Never give up. Keep going.
Shed tears. Cook good meals.
Kilos. Sizes. Worry endlessly.
Follow patterns. Live up to expectations.
Be ladylike. Be a proper woman.
And in between all of this, emerge wiser.

Among the many things I don’t understand, most are feminine.


-- Purva Grover